Category Archives: Sexuality

The Therapeutic Alliance: The Essential Ingredient for Psychotherapy



 I am currently writing on the ‘therapeutic alliance’ – its relation to mindfulness, psychotherapy, understanding, and ‘being listened to…’   What follows is an interesting article that I came across that may interest some of you…


Have you ever tried to change the way you do something? It could be anything — the way you hold your tennis racket, blow into a flute, meditate — you name it. If so, think about that experience. No matter how motivated you were to change, and no matter how much you knew that it would help your serve, musicality, or sense of inner peace, it can be difficult and scary to change even the smallest thing. In order to change, you have to give up your old way of doing something first and then try the new way. That means that for a while you’re in a free fall — you no longer have your old habit to rely on and you don’t yet have the new one.

The anxiety of trying to change something as complex and entrenched as how you relate to people close to you or manage stress takes the feeling to a whole new level. Yet, that’s just what you do when you enter psychotherapy. Just as you had to put yourself into the hand of your teachers and coaches, in therapy you need to gradually do just that with your therapist to help you through what can be a harrowing adventure. The foundation for therapy is called the therapeutic alliance (1, 2). When it’s there, you know that your therapist is there to help you, no matter how hard the going gets.

The therapeutic alliance might be the most important part of beginning a psychotherapy. In fact, many studies indicate that the therapeutic alliance is the best predictor of treatment outcome (3-5).

See entire article:


A mad world A diagnosis of mental illness is more common than ever – did psychiatrists create the problem, or just recognise it?


Unfortunate Events

When a psychiatrist meets people at a party and reveals what he or she does for a living, two responses are typical. People either say, ‘I’d better be careful what I say around you,’ and then clam up, or they say, ‘I could talk to you for hours,’ and then launch into a litany of complaints and diagnostic questions, usually about one or another family member, in-law, co-worker, or other acquaintance. It seems that people are quick to acknowledge the ubiquity of those who might benefit from a psychiatrist’s attention, while expressing a deep reluctance ever to seek it out themselves…

…While a continuous view of mental illness probably reflects underlying reality, it inevitably results in grey areas where ‘caseness’ (whether someone does or does not have a mental disorder) must be decided based on judgment calls made by experienced clinicians. In psychiatry, those calls usually depend on whether a patient’s complaints are associated with significant distress or impaired functioning. Unlike medical disorders where morbidity is often determined by physical limitations or the threat of impending death, the distress and disruption of social functioning associated with mental illness can be fairly subjective. Even those on the softer, less severe end of the mental illness spectrum can experience considerable suffering and impairment. For example, someone with mild depression might not be on the verge of suicide, but could really be struggling with work due to anxiety and poor concentration. Many people might experience sub-clinical conditions that fall short of the threshold for a mental disorder, but still might benefit from intervention.

See link for interesting article on psychiatry…and bits about the importance of psychotherapeutic intervention…

What we do with our women


5 Minutes Of What The Media Actually Does To Women

What do we do with the women in the society when images of women on the internet are manipulated ? What attitudes do we want to transfer to our children? What kind of people do we want to be?
True fact: Almost 100% of the images you see of models and celebrities are altered.
Aren`t you good enough as you are?
Nina, psychologist

Guy couple forced to back of bus



Gay Couple Forced To Back Of The Bus For Holding Hands

The Huffington Post  |  By Posted: 08/03/2013 11:11 am EDT

gay couple back of the bus

A gay couple was reportedly forced to sit in the back of a bus in Albuquerque for simply holding hands. (KRQE)

A gay couple is considering legal action against a bus company after they were allegedly forced to sit in the back of a shuttle bus in New Mexico simply for holding hands.

Ron McCoy and his partner, Chris Bowers, flew into Albuquerque on June 28 for the city’s PrideFest and a Southwest road trip, according to local news station KRQE. After leaving the airport, they hopped on a Standard Parking shuttle bus and sat in the front of the vehicle holding hands.

“I saw him look at us… and he looked so angry,” McCoy told KRQE. “He just blurted out at me, he goes, “Okay, if you’re going to do that, you’re going to the back of the bus.”

Shocked, the two moved, but they had some questions for the driver once they arrived at their stop. When McCoy approached the driver and said he thought they were told to move because they were holding hands, the driver responded, “See, now you’re telling on yourself.”

Good for you sir!! Jason Collins - 1st openly gay active pro athlete

People who try to reduce prejudice

Last month, weekly publication the Alibi spoke with the shuttle driver, Mychael Jones, about why he made the gay couple to move to the back of the bus. He said he didn’t want “women and children” to see the couple’s “inappropriate behavior.” When asked to identify the “inappropriate behavior,” he would not comment any further.

Bill Alberti, manager of Standard Parking, told Alibi that drivers have the right to ask customers to move if they are unruly or causing a disturbance.

“From what I understand, those people were just holding hands and he [the driver] just got off on the wrong foot,” Alberti said, claiming that Standard Parking employees will now undergo more sensitivity and non-harassment training. “On an issue like this, I think he overstepped a little bit.”

A representative for Standard Parking could not be immediately reached for comment.

KRQE reports the couple has since filed a complaint with the American Civil Liberties Union.

This is not the only instance of discrimination in recent weeks. A gay teacher who taught at a California Catholic school for 17 years was fired after he legally married his partner in July. Last week, it was revealed that law enforcement in Baton Rouge has allegedly been targeting and arresting adult gay males under an invalid, unconstitutional anti-sodomy law. Two Oregon lesbians claimed they were recentlykicked out of a cab on the side of freeway after the driver saw them holding hands and kissing in his car.

Russian trooper attack gay activist