Subtle Wisdom


Had to sit through two days of Family Therapy classes last weekend (yes, there are better things to do, I know!). There were some profound lessons and Aha moments which clearly made my choice to specialise in family therapy the right one for me! But this post is not about that…gotcha 🙂

Engaged as I was with what the Prof was discussing, I started to doodle at first. That quickly reminded me that I can’t draw to save my life! Then I flipped through my note book and found this list of – I really don’t know what to call it – concepts and values that I started compiling every time I got bored. These is wisdom distilled into simple concepts I feel we sometimes get ‘wrong’ but which can be so empowering if we know the difference. My all-time favourite which is a lifetime lesson for me is that Vulnerability and Weakness are not the same thing, and actually, the ability to be vulnerable to the right person within the right relationship at the right time is a real strength.

Here’s my list to kick things off and I think you can see where I am going with this…so please write to me and share what you think are issues and concepts we often can’t tell apart but should!


“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time,
and still retain the ability to function.”

F. Scott Fitzgerald


3 responses »

  1. It is too often, in my experience, that vulnerability and weakness are combined to mean the same. I have noticed that there are quite strong people who are vulnerable. Another good contrast is that forgiveness does not equal forgetting; this, too, often is mixed up. Just because one has the ability to forgive does not mean that one will forget that happening. I particularly like the contrast that childlike does not equal childish. People who are naturally or instrinsically childlike are not necessarily childish, although they may be deemed so much to their detriment.

    Wonderful and succinct list of contrasts and a thoughtful post.

    • Thanks for reading and for your further thoughts…I totally agree with your observations. One of the most child-like public figures I have ever had the good fortune to experience ‘live’ (at a conference) is the Dalai Lama…he is the most child-like person I have ever met…so curious, alert and he seems to experience awe in everything. I am so humbled by him and strive always to be child-like like him!

  2. Your thoughtful post puts forth the idea that a therapeutic relationship can be not only helpful, but how important it is to keep perspective on the many contrasts that there are in every relationship – and the interpretation of those feelings, emotions, conflicts.

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