The response to my highly E-Motional post from yesterday was quite overwhelming! Enough so, it motivated me to continue with a bit more on the topic. In other words, due to popular demand, I would like to introduce I SECOND THAT E-MOTION – Part 2.
There is something you may have heard about called our EQ. Our EQ is to our feeling and emotional aspect of ourselves as the IQ is to the intellectual, cognitive aspect of ourselves. It is gaining popularity as more and more people are beginning to realize how important it actually is for people to develop maturity in their emotional skills, which help us better understand, empathize and negotiate with other people. As our economy become more global, this is becoming more and more important because we need to carry this maturity with us as we cross continents and work and live more with diverse cultures and norms.
A person’s EQ determines how well you can understand other people, how to work cooperatively with them, and what motivates them.
Self-Awareness – This is recognizing emotions in the moment, as they happen. It is the key to EQ. It takes practice and more practice because you need to tune into your true feelings, something many of us are very much out of touch with due to all the distractions our lives contain. The only way we can evaluate our feelings is by tuning into them first. Then after we evaluate them, we can set out to manage them. Self-awareness includes:
* Emotional awareness – Recognizing our own emotions and their effects.
* Self-confidence – Be sure about our self-worth and our capabilities.
Self-regulation. Very few of us have any say over when we experience emotions. We do, however, have a lot to say over the intensity of the emotion and its duration. There are a number of techniques we can learn to help anger, anxiety or depression. Utilizing various types of sensory techniques, meditating, praying, or even walking; all are methods for self-regulating. It involves:
• Self-control. Managing disruptive impulses.
• Trustworthiness. Maintaining high levels of honesty and integrity.
• Conscientiousness. Owning full responsibility for your actions.
• Adaptability. Being flexible and bendable, open to change and growth.
• Innovation. Accepting of new methods and ideas.
Motivation. Two things are necessary to succeed. Clear goals and a positive attitude. By being able to tune into negative thoughts right in the moment of their conception, reframing becomes more possible, improving chances to achieve goals. Components of motivation are:
• Achievement drive. The desire to keep improving or reach a level of excellence.
• Commitment. Staying in line with the goals that have been set forth.
• Initiative. Being ever-ready to act on all opportunities as they appear.
• Optimism. Seeing obstacles as stepping stones rather than setbacks.
Empathy. Being able to tell how others are feeling based on relating and connecting to similar feelings in ourselves – brings us closer to others. The more empathetic one is, the more they are able to excel at:
• Service orientation. Anticipating, recognizing and meeting the needs of others.
• Developing others. Tuning into the needs of others to help them reach their fullest potential.
• Leveraging diversity. Finding common ground between varying cultures and individuals despite their differences.
• Political awareness. Being able to recognize levels of power and the relationships of people within a group.
. Understanding others. Discerning the feelings behind the needs and wants of others.
Social skills. Being able to relate to people from all walks of life on various levels becomes more and more valuable. There is value in being able to connect to others, it makes whatever encounters we have with them easier and more effective. These skills are invaluable:
• Influence. The ability to persuade others.
• Communication. Sending and receiving clear messages.
• Leadership. Inspiring and guiding groups and people.
• Change catalyst. Although it is something most people fear, being able to initiate and manage change is an invaluable skill.
• Conflict management. Understanding, negotiating and resolving disagreements.
• Building bonds. Nurturing relationships.
• Collaboration and cooperation. Working with others toward common goals.
• Team capabilities. Creating good feelings and systems within groups to reach goals.
Harvard graduates in business demonstrate how important developing our EQ is for success in life. The more we know and learn about Emotional Intelligence, the happier we can be and more balanced of a life we can live.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Judy is a licensed clinical social worker and has worked extensively as a counselor with children, adolescents, couples and families. Judy’s professional experience in the mental health field along with her love of writing, provide insight into real-life experiences and relationships. Her fresh voice and down-to-earth approach to living a happier, more meaningful life are easy to understand and just as easy to start implementing right away for positive results!