There is a lot of good blogs out there with relevance for psychology. I wanted to present the blog Ability to love, because it is a well-written, important blog based on personal experiences with abuse. The author has herself helped others to recover from abuse, and has gathered a lot of knowledge about Cluster B Personality disorders, how to survive after trauma and what the effect of trauma can be. As a professional, I warmly recommend this if you want to know more about these subjects. Her own presentation of the blog, follows:
About The Ability To Love Blog
This blog is a reflection of years of my personal experience with regards to the Cluster B of dramatic and erratic personality disorders. These are Antisocial Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder. These are disorders of the low/no conscience/empathy disorders. More commonly they are known as borderlines, psychopaths, sociopaths and narcissists. My background is extensive, being the granddaughter, daughter, ex partner and mother to psychopaths. None of these individuals has been officially diagnosed. Most disordered are not. All who have suffered in any role with a psychopath are free to participate and heal here.
I do not spend a lot of time on the clinical perspective, or slicing and dicing the disorders, preferring to simplify these experiences for those who have just come out of the relationships with a Psychopath, Narcissist or Sociopath. Once the disorders are understood, which I try to convey as simply as possible in terms that are understandable and clear about the experience, survivors are able to understand what has happened to them in one of the most toxic relationships and with the most toxic individuals on the planet.
I am not a professional therapist, nor do I possess a degree in the field of psychopathology. I have spent much time researching, reading and reflecting about the disorders in an effort to understand my own experiences. I have read countless books and articles and have listened to the stories of hundreds of survivors recount their relationships of horror with the disordered one. This blog is for educational purposes to the degree that I understand the disorders, as well as for recovery purposes only and I do not claim that what I write is accurate for each individual’s experiences, but merely my own experiences shared, as well as other survivors who participate on this blog. Names, some situations and circumstances in my posts have been changed to protect the privacy of the innocent (and not so innocent).
I am a survivor of a psychopathic parent and multiple sexual and chronic childhood abuse. I am a survivor of three narcissists/psychopaths in romantic relationships in adulthood. I also have a disordered son. Psychopathy is, at this point in time pending ongoing and further research, hypothesized to be genetic, although there is no solid scientific proof of this presently My family, I believe, is genetically predisposed.
I have been writing about psychopathy/narcissism for about three years now and started this blog in June 2012. I am an advocate, mentor (coach) to survivors whose lives have been nearly destroyed by the disordered. I continue to do this today and I love my work. Every survivor that comes here is treated with compassion and respect and I expect courteous and compassionate exchanges on the blog. I am vigilant about survivors safety, as much as is possible on the internet and on this blog, psychopathic stalkers of any survivor here discovered will be immediately reported to the proper authorities. Yes, it has happened. If you choose to share your story, please be safe and use an alternative identity. No one sees your email address on your blog post except me.
My goal is to transparently, authentically and with integrity, add voice on behalf of myself and other survivors who have been abused. Silence is the abusers weapon. It is my hope that with education and support, we as survivors, can work together to remove the weapon of silence out of the abusers hands, while also learning to take responsibility for our own lives and move into personal growth and development through recovery, and healing of our wounds.
Many survivors arrive “after the fact’ from their relationships, to my blog or to my face book or email. My hope is to also educate those who have never been touched by such extremes, in an effort to bring the disorders more to public light.
My blog is very intense, personal and there is raw written material within these posts and it can be triggering for some survivors. Please be advised of this as you read here.
If you are in need of assistance, please see the email guidance page.
If you are a survivor, I especially welcome you. You have a home and a voice here. I hope you find education, support, healing and hope within these pages.
Here is her page:
The following is a list of helpful reading:
1. Without Conscience- Dr. Robert Hare
2. Freeing Yourself From The Narcissist In Your Life- Linda Martinez-Lewi
3. The Betrayal Bond- Dr. Patrick Carnes
4. The Sociopath Next Door- Martha Stout
5. The Highly Sensitive Person- Dr. Elaine Aron
6. Stalking The Soul- Marie-France Hirgoyen
7. Snakes in Suits- Dr. Robert Hare, Dr. Paul Babiak
8. Women Who Love Psychopath- Sandra Brown M.A.
9. The Seducer- Claudia Moscovici
10. The documentary “Fishead”. This can be seen at http://www.fishead.com for free.
11. “I, Psychopath”, youtube.com
- What is narcissistic personality disorder (forfreepsychology.wordpress.com)
- More about psychopaths (forfreepsychology.wordpress.com)
- Borderline Personality Disorder in the Movies (psychologytoday.com)
- The Psychopath/Narcissist: Why Did He Choose Her and Not Me?! (scott-williams.ca)
- Psychopaths ‘have empathy switch’ (bbc.co.uk)